English text on products made in Japan solely for Japanese consumers :


Message printed on an eraser: "Mr. Friendly Quality Eraser. Mr. Friendly Arrived!! He always stay near you, and steals in your mind to lead you to a good situation.". On the bottom of the eraser is a further message: "We are ecologically minded. This package will self-destruct in Mother Earth."


On Coke cans: "I FEEL COKE & SOUND SPECIAL".


Text on a shopping bag picturing dancing elephants: "ELEPHANT FAMILY ARE HAPPY WITH US. THEIR HUMMING MAKES US FEEL HAPPY."


Text on a shopping bag showing yachts on a blue sea: "SWITZERLAND: SEASIDE CITY".


A range of products by a company called Cream Soda used to have the slogan: "Too fast to live, too young to happy"..


Thailand: an ad for donkey rides asked "Would you like to ride on your own ass?".

mebbe some of u may noe tt for a while there, in e beggining of e year i was actually quite depressed... i felt really dumb (2 pure only, mah), i felt really lonely (no friends except 4 mui kee, ren hui, bernice and kristine, all of whom have their own friends anyway) and got all those sai hum teachers like chen yong ming (tt toa ego guy) clement tan (die liao. wat am i going to do for my o levels) and brenda kam. i dunno why, but i dun like dun like dun like her. sometimes, i feel stupid compared to those 3 pure ppl. wait... make it always. and i hate cat class. i just hate it and there's still so many more weeks to confimation. plus some bloody confirmation camp. ARRGGH. but luckily, i still got smthg to console myself. i'll like to ask those who take bio - "what is the ecological impact of Prokaryotes?" and oso, "why was there a need for the relocation of the Acoelomates and Pseudocoelomates?"

P.S: i didn't make those qs up. those terms really exist.

I'm so "blanded", lor. I'm so cool it really really hurts. I mean, come on lor. everyday when i go out, i'm always wearing verARSEce, lor. If i lower my standards a bit ,huh, also wear Louis Mutton also can. Goo(sai)cci also not too lousy for me. I own alot of credit cards, lor. I got Masterfart, u noe!

P.S:those are of course, not my real sentiments. I'm just trying to make a satire of bloody irritating, westernised and image-conscious Singaporeans. don't put brands on a pedestal. where e hell has indiviuality gone to? note:pls don't undermine urselves.